When Edward is gone
by remusandsnapelover
Summary: When Edward leaves Forks for the week, Alice has a vision that Bella and Carlisle never saw coming. Can they pull this love through, when they know it's wrong? Rated T for any suggestions the story may have eventually.
1. Alice's vision

_"Loving you was my favorite mistake." _

**Bella's POV**

Carlisle turned on the radio. "'Come with me, into the trees....'" I shut it off quickly. The lyrics after that part were something I didn't want Carlisle to hear.

"Bella?" he softly questioned me. "Inappropriate song." I could hear him chuckling as he turned the corner to the Cullen house. "Edward will be surprised that you decided to pull the all-nighter with Alice." I scrunched my face up, "He won't be surprised. He gave me 101 ways it would make Alice sad if I didn't come." I didn't see the problem, as vampires didn't even sleep.

"Bella, you put up with too much from our family." I was silent as I got out of the car. "Carlisle?" I whispered. "Yes?"

I took a deep breath. "Do you think I did the right thing in choosing Edward?"

**Carlisle's POV**

I don't know what possessed her to ask that question, but before I could answer, Edward came out to greet us. I quickly barred my thoughts from him, and he looked up at me with a confused face before turning to Bella.

"Are you ready to face my sister's wrath?" I could almost feel the warmth coming off of Bella's face. "It won't be that bad." She said more to herself then us.

"I'm going into Portland for the week, so feel free to extend the sleepover. Some new born vampires have settled there, and I want to make sure they don't get too out of hand." Bella nodded, giving Edward a hug. I tightened my lips- there was a part of me that wanted Bella just as bad as Edward did, and I wanted to keep that part under control.

Edward told her that he loved her, but when she replied back I could hear the saddened tone in her voice from earlier, and I sighed as I watched my son leave as if nothing was wrong.

Alice came down the stairs with a troubled look on her face. "Oh thank god he's gone. Carlisle, Bella, do you have a minute?" Bella smiled, "You guys have all the the time in the world." I chuckled, and Alice looked at me with a disapproving look. My smile dropped, "What's wrong, Alice?"

**Bella's POV**

I wasn't expecting Alice to have a vision of me and Carlisle. Well, maybe my sub conscious brain was, since I had been playing with the idea that me and him would make a good couple over the last week.

It wasn't because I felt less distant with Edward; he was the best person you could ever get. It was the way that Carlisle looked at me with those kind, gentle eyes, like I was something important to him. So when Alice explained to me what she saw was going to happen, I about choked.

"Bella, you need to understand that you can change this. My visions are only based on what a person decides," My shallow breath was the only thing that could be heard in the room. "Unless, you don't want to change it?" Carlisle looked tired next to me, going over her vision in his mind.

_Please don't think I'm crazy, Carlisle._ My thoughts were whirling, and I wanted nothing better then to climb into a hole and hide my face from them. '_You're going to leave Edward, Bella. You'll leave him for Carlisle.'_

"Don't you think this is a little bit extreme, Alice? Bella would never leave Edward." Carlisle still looked calm, but there was an edge to it that I couldn't pin down. This was so wrong, but I wanted so desperately for it to be right. "No, Carlisle. It's the truth; you and Bella must both have made decisions to be with each other because you're both in my vision at your wedding!"

I felt bad for Alice, this wasn't and easy topic. "Bella, why don't you go upstairs for a while." Carlisle whispered. I got up, annoyed that he wanted to keep things from me.

My feet dragged on the steps to Edward's room, and I was a little dizzy from the news I had just received. I paused when I passed Carlisle's room, _It wouldn't hurt if I waited in there. After all, we are getting married._

That wasn't the only reason. I didn't want to be found by Alice _or _Carlisle if I could help it. I just wanted to hide from them until Edward got back from Portland so that he could tell me this was all just a big mistake; that Alice was playing a practical joke on me.

I crawled into his bed, probably the only one in the house, and closed me eyes. They were heavy with sleep already since I hadn't been sleeping well for the last few days. My mind drifted to some unrecognizable pictures and I soon drifted off to sleep.

-

"Bella?" a soft voice came from next to me. My eyes fluttered open to see Carlisle sitting next to me on the bed. He smiled gently. "You were calling for me in your sleep," He wiped the brown mess of hair out my face. "Do you want to talk?" I shook my head violently.

"OK. I'll be here until you do." I looked up into his liquid topez eyes and swallowed loudly. "Carlisle, I don't know what to do."

"None of us do sweetheart. Alice says to just let it be...," He fumbled with my hand, "But Bella, I need to know if you want this. Is Alice telling the truth in saying that you wanted to be with me?" I stared into his eyes, watching for any sign of wanting to be disgusted with me, but he only looked a little sad. "Yes," I stuttered, "For a while. I didn't think of leaving Edward though."

Light tears ran down my face, and I saw the pain in Carlisle's eyes. "I don't want you to hurt, Bella." He lied down next to me, taking me into his arms, "I promise you it will be alright." He kissed me softly on the head as I closed my eyes again to wipe away the fear I felt.

"As soon as forever is through, I'll be over you, Isabella."


	2. Blood thirsty

**Carlisle's POV**

I was quiet as I stood up from where Bella had curled up on my bed. My body ached to stay next to her for the rest of the night, but I had recently taken the night shift at the hospital, and I was in no hurry to start out with bad attendance. (Even if I was the best doctor they had)

"Carlisle," Alice stood in front of me once I got down the stairs. "What do you plan to do when Edward comes home?" I frowned, "I don't know, Alice. Bella and me will work it out." I passed her side, and she watched me with an uneasy look on her face.

"You need to take this more seriously, Carlisle. This is your son and future... wife we're talking about here!"

"You don't need to remind me, Alice!" I snapped at her, and she grew quiet. "I'm sorry," I whispered, "I have to go to work."

---

My car sped down the road to the hospital, with my hands gripping the fine leather around the wheel so hard that it was ripping apart.

"Dr. Cullen." a colleague of mine nodded at me. "Dr. Collins." I regarded him. I sat down at my desk just as a nurse walked in, wearing some absurd green heels.

"Dr. Cullen, you're here so late! Can I get you anything? Coffee, or maybe some tea?" She glanced down at my chest where I had slipped on a tight suit that clung to my muscles just before I had left, and bit her lip anxiously.

"No thanks, Angie." She looked a little disappointed, but perked up when I called her by my first name. I sighed, leaning back in my chair, and covered my eyes. "Oh, and you have a visitor waiting in the lobby." Angie poked her head back into the room.

I got up sluggishly, not really wanting to deal with people for one time in my life. It was a surprise when I walked out and saw Bella sitting in a chair watching some sick people pass her. "Bella, what are you doing here? I thought you were asleep?" She smiled slightly, "I woke up and you weren't there, so I asked Alice where you were. I thought... if it didn't bother you too much... I could possibly sleep here?"

I blinked expressionlessly at her before grinning widely. "I'd love it if you slept here. I'd like some company while I did paperwork." I beckoned her to follow me to my office. Angie passed by, taking one glance at me and Bella before huffing loudly, and walked away. "Did I do something?" Bella worried out loud from behind me. "She just has issues." I smiled warmly, holding the door open for her.

I sat down in my chair, watching Bella look confused at where she should sit. "You can come lay down in m lap. One reason why I bought this chair was because I can extend it outward." She nervously curled up in my lap as I took out some papers. "Sorry if I'm cold." She shook her head, "It's nice."

It took awhile of staring at me and my work before Bella dozed off. I twirled a string of her hair around my fingers as I read a report.

"Carlisle... Edward." Bella's soft voice mumbled out; and I looked down at her closed eyes wondering about how this was effecting her. How could she be forced to choose between me and Edward? Was that even a fair decision for me? Even though she had questioned her love for him in the car with me, I knew Bella would never leave Edward.

Her deep and satisfied sigh filled the room, and I couldn't help but hope she was thinking of me. "God, Bella. Why do you have to make life so difficult after all these years of living?" My aged fingers brushed her lips, and I leaned down slightly to kiss her. Her eyes slightly opened up, "Come on love, I'll take you home."

---

It was late at night by the time I got Bella back in bed. I had asked to leave the office early, and let's face it, they can't say no to me.

Alice was waiting by the stairs again, and I wondered if she had even moved. "Edward called a while ago. I told him that Bella had gone to get some stuff from home. He said he'd call tomorrow." _Great, what is Bella going to tell him? 'Oh, I was sleeping in Carlisle's lap last night.'_

"Thanks, Alice. Sorry Bella fell asleep before you guys could even get a chance at staying up all night. "That's OK." Her eyes actually looked sincere this time, and it made me feel better to think that she didn't hate me for what I had to do. "Don't drop Bella on the way up," She winked. "She doesn't need to know what you're planning to do when you get up there."

"Alice!" I half scolded, even though I knew it had been running through my head. "Come on, Carlisle. You can't be all pure and golden."

I lay Bella down on my bed and undressed myself. I hesitated before lying next to her because she already looked cold.

It sucked that vampires couldn't sleep, seeing that I'd be staying here until she woke up. It didn't bother me though; I'd had years of experience of keeping my mind occupied.

I rested my chin on her shoulder, and she cuddled up closer into my arms. It broke my heart to know that I couldn't keep her warm; that right now the one thing that was in my mind, that I have tried to keep away, is my thirst for her blood. I understood Edward's trouble to keep from ripping her apart, I got every little detail of it. Bella would be delicious, I was sure.

I shook my head; this wasn't something I should be thinking about. But it still tickled my curiosity. I tilted my head slightly so that I was right next to her neck, and placed my teeth at her collarbone. I nibbled just enough so that I could taste her blood. _Oh, shit. _Was all I could come up with.

She was more than I expected; the red liquid was warm and delicious. My body tensed up next to her, and I could see her shiver run down her spine. "_Carlisle."_ a voice in my head warned. I ignored it; licking the remaining blood that had run out before it dried. But I couldn't stop. I teethed open a little more of her skin, tasting the delight of her blood flowing down my throat. "Carlisle...." I could hear Bella moan my name next to me. My fingers slid up to where I had cut her neck, and covered it in her sweet smelling blood. _"Carlisle!"_ I halted where I was as my conscious took me away from the monster I was becoming. I was killing her, slowly, and all she could do was sleep without knowing what I was doing. I lied back against the bed with my shaking bloody hands in front of me.

"I love you, Bella. I love you." Was all I could get out, as I could feel my eyes lighten from the black darkness I had made them.


	3. I'm sorry Edward

**Bella's POV**

I woke up in Carlisle's arms today. He looked disturbed so I was hesitant to move. "Carlisle?" I whispered. He looked down at me, surprised. "Bella, you're up early. Did I... did I wake you?" his voice trembled. "No, of course not. Are you OK?"

He shrugged, "Never better." But I knew he was lying; I could see it in his eyes. I wiggled my way out of his arms and walked down to the kitchen. Alice was there of course, also with a strange look on her face. A look of disgust. "Hey, Alice." I slowly approached her. "Bella! How are you?" she snapped herself out of her daydream. "I'm fine. Thanks."

I opened a few cupboards looking for food and found what I wanted, Raisin Bran. Sitting down, I watched Alice look over at me and then hastily look down. "You know that stuff is gross, right? Edward once dared me to eat it." Carlisle smiled from behind me, rubbing my shoulders lightly.

I noticed Alice stiffen when she noticed him walk in.

"Carlisle, we need to talk." her voice was hard, and she didn't look like she wanted to talk about ponies and rainbows with him. Carlisle sighed and gently took his hands off of my shoulders where he was resting. He walked into the living room with her, and I desperately wanted to hear what Alice was so keen on saying, that she couldn't say it in front of me. But I resisted, it's not like I would be able to hear them anyways.

When Carlisle came back in, Alice was no where to be seen. Carlisle looked tired, even though there was no way he could ever be sleepy again. "Bella, I have to talk to you about something," he sat down next to me," Last night, I wanted to know what... what your blood tasted like. I was morbidly curious. I shouldn't have, but I wanted to taste it _so_ _bad_," I looked down at my feet, I knew where this was going. "I wasn't trying to hurt you, I just wanted a taste. And well, I went a little too far. I almost couldn't stop. You don't know how _good_ your blood tastes. Damn, it was all I could do to stop myself... I'm so sorry, Bella." He looked heartbroken, and it pained me to see him that way.

"I know, Carlisle. I forgive you." He shook his head. "You shouldn't. Edward would kill me if he knew."

"But he won't."

Carlisle stared into my eyes, and it felt like he could see into my soul. "Come here, Bella." He stretched out his arms, and I crawled in his lap. He kissed my head gently. "What did I ever do to deserve some one like you?"

I laughed, "You didn't do anything; you're already perfect. The question is, what did _I_ do to deserve _you_?"

He pulled me tighter into his arms, "I love you, Isabella Swan. I always will."

Alice had finally forgiven Carlisle after he promised he would let her have me for the night. She forced me to crawl into pajamas and watch _2012_ with her. But I wasn't that into the movie, (besides, how would vampires die from an Apocalypse? They _wouldn't_.) I was more into thinking about Carlisle.

What would I tell Edward? Would he even forgive me for something like this?_ No_. I started quivering, and had to excuse myself from Alice. She probably thought I was just too overcome by how L.A was going down from an earthquake, or maybe she had a vision of me leaving, and already knew the reason why.

Carlisle was in the kitchen reading. I took the book out of his smooth hands. _Teach me_. "I never put you as someone who liked teacher/student relationships." He grinned, only making me smile in return. "I'm not. It was at the library, and it was the closest thing I could find to our situation." I was silent and his grin faded away. "Edward had recommended it to me actually. I never got around to it though."

"Carlisle, what we're doing is wrong. It's not fair." He slowly put down his book and got up to stand by me. "Not fair to who? Edward? Things happen, Bella, and sometimes people get hurt because of them. Do you not think I curse at myself every time I touch you? Every time I taste your mouth?" I must have looked hurt, because his expression changed from serious to softness. "I don't mean it like that. I mean that I hate knowing that I'll hurt my son, hurt him so bad that he might despise me. It kills me every time I think of you."

He cupped my chin in his hands, "And I think of you a hell lot." I touch his chest softly and wrap my other hand around a lock of his hair. "I'm glad you do." He chuckles and kisses me. We're just getting into it, I'm already hyperventilating, when his watch beeps. He pulls back and looks at me apologetically. "Work time. I'll be back in the morning." I kiss him and he lingers, "I love you." he whispers. "I love you too, Carlisle." He lets go of me and he's gone when I blink my eye.

I tell Alice I'm tired and head up to Carlisle's bed. Just as I'm getting into bed, Alice's pixy voice calls my name, "Bella, it's Edward!" My breathing stops. Not now, please not now. I walk as slowly as I can to get the phone; I can't make another excuse for why I can't talk to him. His voice in my ears almost brings tears to my eyes. "Bella." Alice looks pitifully at me and walks out of the room to give me space.

"Hey, Edward. How are the vampires down in Portland?" His voice is tense; does he know? "They sure put up a good fight. I've been trying to calm them down, but it always results in me killing them, which I hate thanks to Carlisle," I want to moan when I hear him says Carlisle's name. "They're making me exhausted, figuratively of course." So then he doesn't know about my situation, thank god. "I'm glad you're doing OK." He laughs, "If you could say that. I miss you a lot, Bella, and I want to come home as soon as possible. I think I'll take two more days and come home; I can't put you under Alice's torture forever."

"I'm enjoying Alice!" I say almost a little too quickly. I can hear the confusion in his voice, "Do you not want me to come home?" I bite my lip, "Of course I do," I muster up all my strength to utter words I'm not sure are true anymore, "I miss you." His voice lets up, and I untense. "I'll see you then. I love you."

"I love you." I reply, and hang up. I slide my hand through my hair and sigh. This isn't fair; to him or me.

Alice is still watching her movie, but she looks up when I pass by. "Goodnight, Bella." She says softly. "Night, Alice." I can feel her eyes on my back as I head up once again to Carlisle's room. For the first time, I notice a small picture on his dresser. It's of me and Edward.

I crawl into his bed, covering myself in his sheets. I can smell him in them, and it comforts me. I slide my shirt and pants off on to the floor; this is the closest I'll get to being by him tonight. _Edward is coming back in two days,_ I tell myself. How am I ever going to get through this? How can Carlisle want me after it, after I've broken his son?

I groan, why does love have to be so tough? My eyes wander back to the picture of me and Edward.

"I'm sorry, Edward."


	4. Edward

A/N **Yeah, this is short. Forgive me! I had to reread the story because I had kind of forgot what it was about... bad me. And no, I really didn't know what to do... I winged it on this chapter kind of. So please, please if you can, give me a comment telling me some ideas you would like to see happen in this story. 'Cause if you don't, I just might send Bella and Carlisle off to Russia or Alaska; and that defiantly wasn't how I wanted the story to go. Thank you to all of you have alerted to this story.**

**Bella's POV**

Two days. Two days until Edward comes home. I'm a total mess- my hair is dirty and my eyes are filled with sleep."I'm going to take a shower." I whisper to Carlisle as I get out of bed.

The heat of the water streams down my back and I sigh loudly. Edward... Carlisle... two amazing guys, yet only one could be my soul mate. _"Carlisle,"_ My mind immediately responds. I smile lightly even though the whole situation is nothing to laugh about.

"I heard a sigh." Carlisle's velvet voice floats into the bathroom as he pulls the shower curtain aside. "You don't mind if I step in for a while, do you?" I laugh as he starts to get into the shower. "In your clothes?" A small smile plays on his lips, "Well, Ms. Swan, if you would rather I take them off, than I suppose I can work that to our favor." I watch as he unbuttons his collared shirt and undoes his pants.

As he steps into the shower, I can't help but take him in. He's a god, and none the less.

I gulp loudly, unsure of what to do. He smiles, taking a hold of my waist and pulling me to him. "Do you know how beautiful you look drenched in the water?"

"Nothing compared to what you look like." I respond as I kiss his lips tentatively. "Oh, I'd have to disagree." He picks my legs up from underneath me and kisses me for quite some time. "You see, Bella, the water clings to your skin and I can't help but kiss you even more." He pushes me against the wall and pulls his mouth back just enough so that I can feel the warm air from his breath on my face. "Looks like it'll turn out to my advantage then." He barks out laughing before taking my lips in his again.

I've never felt so alive.

* * *

"Alice, we're pressed for time." I don't think I've ever been so stressed about Edward coming home. Well of course I haven't- I've never had something to hide from him before now. "I know, Bella." Her voice rings at the end. I can tell she's a little irritated with me, but I'm just as stressed as she is.

"Oh!" I hear her stop just as she's about to sit down. "Alice?" I ask carefully.

"He's coming home, Bella. Edward is coming home tonight."

"What?" I almost scream, "No! It's too soon! I was supposed to have another day!" Carlisle chooses that moment to walk in, "Bella, it'll be OK." I look over at him, desperation in my eyes, "Carlisle, we've got to leave. We've got to gt away. We can run away and pretend that the Volturi came for us. Please, I don't want to have to go back to the way life used to be!" He stops dead in his tracks and his eyes don't blink as he stares me right in the eye, "Bella, it's not that easy. I know that it's going to be hard, but we owe Edward some kind of respect. We can't just leave." He looks over at Alice and sighs, "And what about Alice? She'd be heartbroken if you left her."

I can feel the tears well up in my eyes as I begin my last cling at insanity, "But, Carlisle, I can't do this to Edward. I can't... I just can't." I wrap my arms up into his chest and cry. I can hear Alice hesitating before patting me on the back of my head softly. "It will be OK, Bella. I know it will be; I can tell." But I don't believe her, so I let Carlisle hold me in his arms until the tears dried up.

"Sweetheart." Carlisle's soft voice brought my eyes up to look into his. "I'm not leaving you. I'll be with you every step of the way."

"_Dying seems less sad than having lived too little."_


	5. Carlisle's a blood thirsty demon

**A/N It's been a while since I updated this story.:) What I need is some ideas to help keep the story going, so please comment and share what you think should go on next. I mean, how long could I keep Edward gone for? Not for forever! Well... I could banish him into the back of my story since my story IS called When Edward is GONE. *stabs pen down on paper* He's gone! Gone, gone! :) That was really random.(Plus I use the computer to write) Anyways, I'm begging you guys for ideas. Enjoy.:)  
**

"Bella, it seems like it's been a lifetime." That's Edward. Yeah, my Edward. And he's happier than I've ever seen him, because he's seeing me. "Edward, I've missed you." I hug him briefly, sensing the tenseness from Carlisle standing in the corner. "Alice didn't give you too much trouble, did she?" Edward flashes my favorite crooked smile over at his sister who tries hard to smile back. Edward's smile dims a bit and he looks me straight in the eyes, "What's with everyone today? Did I surprise you that much?"

"_Like you'd never believe."_ My thoughts echo in my mind. "Everything is fine," I do everything I can to give him my best grin, "We've just missed you so much." I walk over to where Carlisle is standing, and almost grab his hand before remembering that Edward wouldn't like that.

"Son, Bella hasn't been able to sleep very well since you left; I think it would be best for her to go to bed." Edward smiled at me, "Of course. Carlisle, you should go out hunting- it's been too long for you."

"Then it's settled. I'll be back in the morning."

"Carlisle-" I started but he cut me off. "Bella, I hope you have a goodnight. Edward's right, I need to go hunting... it clears the mind." I get one last dazzling smile from my father figure before he dashes out the door into the black forest surrounding the house.

"Let's get you to bed, Bella." Edward takes my hand, and I follow him. To be quite honest, I don't know where to sleep now that I can't be in Carlisle's bed. "Goonight, Bella!" Alice's soft voice comes from downstairs.

Edward leads me into his room, and puts some blankets down for me on his couch. I lay down on top of them while Edward goes to take his place in a chair close by. What had I ever done to make him have to go through this? "Goodnight, my _cantante_." But he was so far from the truth... I was not Edward's singer, but Carlisle's. "Goodnight, Edward." I respond heavily.

* * *

My eyes fluttered open slightly. Edward wasn't there. "Edward?" I questioned softly, moving the blankets off of me. He must have gone out, must have gotten tired of me sleeping. I sighed; Carlisle had never tired of watching me sleep. Speaking of Carlisle...

I got up from my makeshift bed to walk over to the doors in Edward's room that led to the outside. I slowly let myself down to the ground before taking off in a sprint towards the woods. "Holy s***!" I cussed loudly as I tripped over a fallen branch after getting a mile away from the house. I heard a growl a few feet away and looked in front of me to see what looked like a man crouched down over a dead deer. "Oh." Was all I could manage to get out.

Carlisle's face whipped around to face me, his eyes black as the night, with blood creeping down the side of his mouth. If I wasn't so scared I would have been slightly turned on by the sight.

A surprised look darted across his face and the next thing I knew he had flung himself across the field and into a tree.

"Carlisle!" I shouted in horror as he fell to the ground. I could hear his hoarse voice as he stood up, shaking, "For god's sake, Bella. You could have gotten yourself killed sneaking up on me like that."

I couldn't speak- I was too shocked to do anything. Carlisle's eyes looked down to the ground where my leg was positioned at an awkward angle. His eyes faltered from the normal calm Carlisle to the broken Carlisle I hated seeing. "What have you done to yourself now, love?" He was over to me in a flash, inspecting my leg. "Of course it's sprained. When will you learn to be more careful?" A playful smile etched across his face and then disappeared. "Bella, you're bleeding."

"Am I?" I swiped my hand across the side of my leg and brought it up to my face to see a fair amount of blood on it. "The branch must have scratched me." Carlisle took my hand with the blood on it to his face. "Bella." He sat crouched there for a minute before he realized that I needed care to my leg. "I need to make you a brace. Give me a second." In no time at all he had me standing, holding onto his shoulder for support. "We need to get back or Edward will come searching for you. I'll call Alice and let her know it'll be a while since I can't carry you with a brace on."

"You mean we'll have to walk?" He gave a grim smile before dialing Alice's number.

What had I done, getting myself into this kind of wreck? I was lucky Carlisle didn't pounce the second he saw me. He had a lot of restraint- more than Edward did. "Come on, Bella. We have all the time in the world, but if we don't hurry, Edward will be over here to drag you back home." I took Carlisle's hand as he led me back to the house. This was how it was supposed to be.

"What were you thinking going out to find him? He could have killed you!" Edward's worried voice rang in my ears when I got back home. Carlisle put a hand out to Edward, "Son, she's had enough for one night. Let her rest." Edward ran his hand through his hair before storming up to his room. "Thank you." I whispered to Carlisle. He nodded his head and walked away. "Carlisle?" His head turned to look back at me. "You know." I couldn't say what I wanted to say; not with Edward being able to here everything we said. "I know." His tired smile gave away all the love in the world- all the love I could ask for.

_I'm in here, can anybody see me?  
Can anybody help?_


End file.
